CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Caronda Robinson said some days are tougher than others when she thinks about her son Jamir.
“It’s been 15 years and I think about what he would be doing today, who he would look like,” she said. “But some days I just cry and some days I’m OK.”
Robinson never got to take her son home or watch him grow up.
She said she still remembers that fateful day when she went for what was supposed to be a routine checkup as she entered her eighth month of pregnancy. She knew her first child was going to be a boy. She had already given him a name
“I named him Jamir, I had named him way before,” Robinson said as her voice trailed off.
It was during that routine visit to her doctor that the day turned into the most painful day of her life.
“I was in the doctor’s office, we were doing the ultrasound and the ultrasound tech left," she recalled. "She came back in with the doctor, and they said, 'I’m sorry, there’s no heartbeat.'"
After eight months, Robinson had to process that Jamir would be stillborn.
“It was devastating, I felt so alone," Robinson said. "I had family and friends and church members around me but I felt like nobody understood the pain I was going through, to have this baby inside of you for eight months but no baby to bring home.”
After months of despair and tears, Robinson found a way to deal with her pain by helping others who are also forced to deal with the reality of losing a child during pregnancy, or as an infant.
Robinson started the nonprofit organization Jamir’s Heart, which offers to pay for one-on-one counseling services for mothers of children who have died.
Jamir’s Heart also helps pay for funerals for stillborn children.
“When you have a stillbirth, insurance does not pay for it, so Jamir’s Heart helps with burying your child,” Robinson said.
The past four years, Jamir's Heart has held a Balloons of Love balloon release for anyone who has lost a child, no matter the age. The balloon release is held in October each year at the Weeping Willow AME Zion Church parking lot located on Milton Road in East Charlotte. This year it will take place at 1 p.m. on Saturday.
Robinson said she started the balloon release after she noticed how a balloon release in honor of her sister gave her mother some solace; she wondered if it would help people who’ve lost their children.
People can come to the release, write whatever they want on a balloon or multiple balloons -- or in some cases nothing at all, and then release the balloons into the skies. It's a simple way to help ease some of the pain and let others know they are not alone.
“We cry, we laugh and it’s great to be around people who understand your pain,” Robinson said. “It has created memories, friendship, it has grown Jamir’s Heart, which helps mothers we all come together and love on each other. It’s just an experience.”
Contact Richard DeVayne at rdevayne@wcnc.com and follow him on Facebook, X and Instagram.